All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Randomize
