do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize