their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
