Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
