we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
