never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
