My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize