I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize