No awkward lesbian experiences without me
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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