So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
