Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize