I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
