"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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