Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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