New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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