he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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