I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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