Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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