Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
