We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
