Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(630): View more from Illinois

Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.

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(616): View more from Michigan

Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband

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(740): View more from Ohio

Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night

(631): View more from New York

U should. Its a good ice breaker

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(903): View more from Texas

....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."

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(505): View more from New Mexico

you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.

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(289): View more from Ontario

you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window

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(858): View more from California

I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...

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(778): View more from British Columbia

I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions

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