I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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