Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
