I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
You are a genius and a whore.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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