Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
