she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
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At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
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For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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