So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
