from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
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