I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
