I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
