This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize