we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
