he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
