I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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