physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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