Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
