Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
