I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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