Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Randomize
