Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Randomize
