There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
