sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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