Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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