Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas