After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
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If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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