i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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