it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
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