My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
We are two peas in an std pod
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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