yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
