I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
