i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize